Are you one, like so many of us, who is afraid to ask for help when you really are in need of some?
Have you ever been in a supervisory type role–either at work or in some type of ministry– and really dreaded asking people for the help that you really needed?
Maybe in your personal life you were going through a struggle and really needed to vent or have someone join you in prayer to make it through but were afraid to ask?
Why do we find it so hard to ask others for help in a situation?
Fear of rejection?
Afraid of being vulnerable–we might get hurt?
We might not be in control–it is hard to give up control?
Our frailty might be exposed?
We feel like we are imposing on others?
Photo credit by Joanne Morton under Creative Commons License (CC BY-NC 2.0)
Think about this…..
Sometimes….
people need to be asked; they might not know of the need otherwise.
people need to know they can make time to help.
people will be blessed by sacrificing & doing more.
people need to be reminded they are part of a bigger picture.
I want to encourage you to think that maybe, just maybe, it is okay to ask others for some kind of help.
It is possible that in your reaching out and asking, you will get the help you need AND you just might enable the helper to be blessed through their act of service.
I will share a few simple examples from my life of where I was blessed when people asked me for something~~~
Recently, a lady from our church asked if my husband and I would be willing to help seat people at a harvest dinner the church was having. She would hold up the number of fingers of people to be seated in a particular group, and we would wave the people to their seat. Since the dinner started earlier than my husband could arrive there, I roped our youngest son into coming and helping too.
My son, in the green shirt & hat, helping with the drinks during a lull.
Being the people waver/seater was the perfect job for him. He is much taller than me so it was easier for the people to see him, and he is definitely more outgoing and fun. He did a great job of jumping up and down amongst all the people to flag the new comers to the correct table. When there was a little lull in people coming, my son jumped in and helped in serving drinks as well.
As I was wandering among the sea of people that came to the harvest dinner, I thought how blessed it was to be there helping. It was so nice to see everybody doing their “little” part to work toward a successful event. Watching my son interact with so many people was a joy…whether he knows it or not…I think he was sharing the Lord in Him with others through fun and service…maybe even making them smile for a few moments. I was truly thankful for the lady asking us to help. I had not heard of them requesting help before she called. It was a simple, few hours, one time commitment that was a joy to assist at…all because she asked.
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Four years ago at the school where all three of my children went to grade school, I saw a newsletter article asking for help in the preschool class. The teacher was the same one who had my youngest son. Even though I already work part-time, I thought this might be a fun, different type of experience where I could help out a few hours a week. As you might already know, I am happiest when I am helping others in some capacity so this sounded like a good opportunity.
Yes, the rest is history. I started helping out a few hours a week stuffing the Friday folders for the children, labeling papers, prepping the classroom for the next week, and whatever little job needed to be done. I assisted for two years with that teacher, at the end of which she and her family moved away. Last year I learned they did not have the preschool program.
Another teacher from the school contacted me during this summer to ask if I would help again this year as they had enough children for the program. I was kind of hesitant because, at least for me, it seems once you stop doing a ministry or event, it seems like you wonder how you will have time to do it once again. Isn’t there always something to keep us busy? But, as I look back already…I do know I am suppose to be there.
When I am helping out, I enjoy doing the paperwork, and sometimes find myself praying for the children, and am blessed by seeing the joy of the Lord on their faces. Some of their faces just light up when they smile at you. 😃 Being there reminds me that people are most important and influencing others in whatever small way we can is what we are called to do. I am thankful the teacher asked me to help again.
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Photo credit by Martin LaBar under Creative Commons License (CC BY-NC 2.0)
Having a friend that I worked with over 20 years ago send me a birthday card with a note asking me to pray for some of her family members, ended up prompting me to call her and plan a lunch date. We had a wonderful time visiting and catching up on each others lives. I was able to learn more specifics about what to pray for and learned of other situations to pray about too.
When someone requests us to pray for something, it is such an honor and blessing. Praying for others is such a vital and important part of life. Lifting up their needs to the Lord can certainly change the situation. Prayer is powerful!
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So, in all three of these examples, people reaching out and asking for help or to do something led to many blessings for both parties involved.
As we know, there are certain inherent risks that can happen when we reach out to others and ask for something.
One is that we might not get a favorable response in our asking. Despite this possibility, it is still important to step out and ask. If we don’t ask, we can not receive.
In those cases where maybe you ask and do not receive the answer you expected, maybe that was not the “right” person to ask. If you end up getting hurt in the situation, it is best to ask the Lord to help you forgive the person, and move on.
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It was six weeks ago that I first asked an athletic trainer to see if he could work with my son so he could continue to strengthen his shoulder that was injured in the spring. I texted and even called the trainer to get things started. He was suppose to call my son’s physical therapist to discuss what my son had done there, but never did. A few weeks ago, my son had issues where his shoulder felt like it did back when he first injured it. We finally decided we asked the trainer enough times and it was a better option to move on and go a different route. Deciding to go with the gym of the original physical therapist where they can still keep on eye on my son’s progress seemed the right direction. And, yes, I am working on the forgiveness part. 🙂
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This week try to step out in faith and if you need someone’s help, ask them! On the same hand, try to be attentive to those people around you who might need you to step up and be there for them. Life is to be lived in community…where no man is an island.
Photo credit by BK under Creative Commons License (CC BY-SA 2.0)
In reflecting on times in your life where someone asked you for help, or you asked someone else for something, can you think of ways you ended up being blessed? I would love to hear your experience, so yes, I am ASKING you to take a few moments and share in the comment section below. 😃
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.” …So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets. –Matthew 7:7-8; 12 (NIV)
Going a little farther, He (Jesus) fell with His face to the ground and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.” –Matthew 26:39 (NIV)
This summer I was a bit saddened when my extended family (for the first time in 10 years) did not invite my son to go on their family vacation to the beach. My son’s cousins are really like brothers to him – and I knew that this trip was something he really looked forward to. Instead, they let their son choose his “best friend” from school – which I knew was bothering my son (although he wouldn’t admit it) So I prayed about it for a few weeks, and then kindly asked if it were at all possible to take my son also – even if he slept on the floor. They realized the oversight, and how important this family bonding was for my son. They personally called him and told him they wanted him to go…and that family should always come first. There is a “bigger picture” and sometimes we just need to be reminded of it. But it wouldn’t have been resolved had I not ASKED.
Thank you for sharing that perfect example of how asking blessed your son and I’m sure the extended family as well with more bonding time! It was also a great point about first praying about the situation before asking. Thanks for faithfully reading, Carol. Blessings to you and your family!